WK10 - Chinning Up

Once again, we have a change in leadership inside Tri-Hard!

"I see that," said Safari, tapping his bloody claws on a freshly polished mahogany table. ("Noooooo! Watch the polish!" said Burgundy.)

A month ago, Safari's fantastic run at number one was snapped by Dick Burns. Though Dick's surge to the top was formidable, it was short lived; Safari reclaimed the throne just one week later and sat atop the rankings for another three weeks. However, with the passing of WK10, Safari has been dethroned again, this time by two-time Randy League Champion AznSitch.

You gotta werk, bitch.

"It's all about 'dem hard werk," said Sitch, as he addressed the (Perry Fire absent) media after Sunday's games. "I know who I'm up against, and like I said during my NQ, I NEVER underestimate the competition. If you're not leading the pack, sit the fuck down and start crunchin' till you get a six-pack. Then jump onto the chin-up bar, wide-grip style, and pull yourself together. Burn It To Earn It, Brah!"

Here are the visuals, courtesy of the stats machine. McGuire will provide the colour commentary. They've been revamped too. (MS Office 2013 for the win - excuse the nerdiness.)

Adds McGuire: What a strong performance from Sitch this week! With 183.40 points earned, Sitch accumulated almost 50 points more than next best select-GM Dick Burns (who had 133.80 points). Sitch can thank his goalies for picking up two shutouts and a handful of wins, as well as strong defensive performances from free-agent pick-up Drew Doughty (1 G, 3A) and recently returned from injury Kris Letang (3 G).

Any other top performers this week, Pierre?

Adds McGuire: Ovechkin was actually this week's top performer, but was benched by Safari on the night he tallied 2 G. However, Safari also had a star in van Riemsdyk, who collected 20+ fantasy points this week. Like LeBrun said during the Combine, JvR is an extremely underrated player.

Adds McGuire: And look at that; it's Sitch's first week at the top this year. I'm not going to start speculating whether his longevity will last (sources say lasting is a challenge for the man) but if you look at the last two years, Sitch stayed atop the rankings once he got there.

"That sample size is hardly large enough to extrapolate, " said Burgundy in disgust. "I'm an MPA and I know for a fact that a sample size of two is insufficient."

Adds McGuire: It was a very productive week for the League in general, which is somewhat shocking given that Crosby was MIA due to the mumps ("Fuck the mumps!" said Burgundy). PPGP for the entire League was up 0.02. Sitch still leads all select-GMs with a PPGP of 3.64 (up 0.13 from the previous week), thanks mostly to superb goaltending. Burgundy is second, sporting a 3.37 (down 0.04 from the previous week) while Safari is third with a 3.32 (down 0.03 from the previous week).

Adds McGuire: And finally we have the rainbow. The only chink in Sitch's muscular armour is assists; he's averaging a League-low 0.43 per game, but more than makes up for it with his goals and goaltending. I've spoken to Sitch about his current situation, and he's looking to diversify.

"I want it all green," said Sitch when referring to the rainbow. "I'm looking to make a few transactions to better my assists. I don't want no chinks!"

A few trades would be interesting for sure. Mr. Fucking Randy finds it surprising that a trade hasn't occurred yet. Rumours have it that Sitch was shopping around Lundqvist to see if there would be any interest, though the return would be a high draft pick.

"No comment on that," said Sitch.

Until next time, gentlemen and lady.

- the Fucking Randy